Reflective Essay on Musical Background

Music is not something that was ever prominent in my family background. All in all, I found that when it comes to musicking my family took place as the listener and I myself followed this role. However, I believe that I have taken the role more seriously and used music as a tool for mood, an inspiration, and a connection.

As I recall, my grandma took piano, however, now just as her knowledge of french has faded I believe her skill for piano playing has too. My own piano experience lasted up to around four weeks before I quit. I struggled, I was impatient, and I suppose those are things even the best musicians go through, but it was time to quit. I knew I was no musician. Even earlier from my failed attempt at pianoing I began dancing from age four--ballet and tap, tap and ballet. One after the other, many misguided steps, many better than me, and every dance teacher, particularly the ballet instructors, with a strict attitude and noses pointed high with pride (not to mention, russian accents seemed to be the usual with ballet instructors and those did not add to my fear of them.) One year, during my journey to become a sugar plum in our city’s annual production of The Nutcracker I missed two practices--both for funeral. I came back, excited, ready to get to work, and there was my ballet instructor of the year, standing with her tall height, her pointed features pulled back angrily. With her hint of an accent she simply said, “You’ve missed too many practices. You’re out.” And I quit, there and then, never to step into dance again. I never missed it.

Rather than musicking, I had always been dedicated to visual art. From my early childhood I would draw nonstop and throughout my life I collected and went through dozens and dozens of sketchbooks. This is where my life was headed, I thought. I would be a visual artist like my aunt. Yet in sixth grade I had my first artistic shift. After seeing the movie The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, after then devouring all the books in The Chronicles of Narnia series I found a burst of new artistic energy take over me. Like C.S. Lewis, I wanted to create my own world, with my own characters, and stories--but with visual art there struck a problem. Visual art, while expressive, was not expressive enough for me to really get at getting detailed and broad on my world and its citizens and tales. So what was there to do but try writing out--and I did. I did not think to slowly creep in, dip my toe into the pool, I barged right in with a pen, scraping away at paper. My story could have been considered original for my age though taking a closer look it was merely a cheap knockoff version of C.S. Lewis’ own. Regardless, here I was, a writer or at least on my way to becoming one. And so I traded in sketchbooks for notebooks.

With writing comes a mood. The method of getting a mood involves finding yourself a calming environment, finding yourself secluded from others, it depends, but what I like to use is, yes, music. There are all kinds of music--calm, erratic, melancholy. To write the scene, you must find the track that would be able to fall into the backdrop of a movie scene. Which brings me to the detail that when I write I use a screenwriter’s and director’s mindset. Though I mostly write prose, screenwriting is another type of writing I love to do. With this approach you must think of the scene visually, map out the characters positions, their outfits, their mannerisms, their speech patterns, etc. To make a scene impactful, if it fits, you could use silence, but when that does not fit, and more than not, it does not, you must use a score. Therefore, I think of the music I select for writing as my own story’s score. Often, with songs with words I will pin point them to certain characters. These songs will draw out the passion and drive I have for my characters and will push me to get to work. Other times instrumental is key, as most scores are instrumental. This will create a mood for the characters to act upon, speak upon, and will evoke emotion with the audience as they view and listen.

As I pay attention to scores in movies--for example, listening to them after the movie to get a better sense of them, being able to focus only on listening rather than also watching--I have come to see the differences in scores depending on the setting. This is crucial, because the audience must be aware of the setting, be influenced by the setting, get a feel of the setting, and if an audience member is a part of that setting, they need to feel a connection. While I was not exposed to much culture in music within my family, I could learn it from movies and television series. The clearest example I could give is The Lion King. When I was young, this movie exposed me to a type of music and culture I was not at all used to. As I recall, The Lion King took place in Kenya. The score was incredibly rooted in that culture, every song having the sound of Kenyan beat, tune, rhythm, and instruments. Another example, as well as my favorite Disney movie, would be Mulan, which takes place in China and incorporates classic Chinese sound and instruments into the music, blended with a modern day twist. There was also, Pocahontas (Native American), The Jungle Book (Indian), Aladdin (Arabic), The Hunchback of Notre Dame (French and Romani), and so on. Even with the problematics within the errors of certain aspects of different cultures portrayed in their movies, Disney is actually a great example of being introduced to different cultures as a child through music. Therefore, I believe this background surely readied me to be curious and open-minded about the music of other cultures.

In conclusion, while my roles as musician and a dancer were cut short, I believe I connect strongly to the role of listener in musicking. My intense love for the soundtracks of music set me a path for being involved with music. My childhood passion for Disney  geared me towards be engaged with the music of different cultures around the world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TerKgrAFQ5k